10 REAL WAYS TO GET A BETTER ORGASM

10 REAL WAYS TO GET A BETTER ORGASM

Orgasms seem to be my favorite thing to write about lately since realizing how little the world really understands female orgasms. Most women don’t even fully understand what the hell is going on down there, and also probably why many of us aren’t getting the orgasms we want.

 Women’s Health Online had some great resources on the topic, and I couldn't help add my own research. Here's some surefire ways to better understand how to help your body catch those super intense orgasms. 

Oxytocin: According to Women’s Health Magazine, a study found that couples who received oxytocin via a nasal spray had more intense orgasms than couples who did not. Oxytocin is known as the “love hormone” because it plays a major role both in social bonding and sexual reproduction. The body releases oxytocin naturally through touch: so kiss more, cuddle more, and just touch your partner more. As your body releases more of the hormone oxytocin, there’s a greater chance you’ll have one of those explosive orgasms.

The body releases oxytocin naturally through touch: so kiss more, cuddle more, and just touch your partner more.

The body releases oxytocin naturally through touch: so kiss more, cuddle more, and just touch your partner more.

Foreplay Focus: According to research gathered by the American Sociological Review, women increase their chances of an orgasm by 18% when they play with themselves before sex and by 9% if they receive oral sex. What does that tell us? 1, it tells us men clearly need to get better at giving oral sex since our own hands still seem to work better (lol) and it tells us warming up before the main event can really make a huge difference. In my own opinion I feel foreplay helps because it’s usually when the clitoris gets the most attention, and if you’ve read some of my other articles you know how vehemently I believe the clitoris is the only place you need to look if you want to find your orgasm.

Lube: Apparently lube makes for better orgasms. I’m not trying to toot my own horn or anything, but I’ve never really needed to use lube. However, it makes sense that using lube could help some women reach better orgasms. The more lubrication you’ve got down there the more friction your vagina can withstand without it hurting you, or tearing microscopic tears on the skin that often happen during sex. The more friction on the clit, the better chance of an orgasm.  

Practice: Solo sessions make your orgasms better. Wondering why you need to practice something that should come so natural? Well it doesn’t really. The vagina is complicated, and there is little real research on how it works for our pleasure, so the best chance we’ve got is to get to know our own vagina as well as possible. Poke around, figure out where your favorite pressure points are, find out how sensitive your clitoris is, examine how many levels of orgasms you can identify. Become an expert in getting yourself there, and you’ll have no problem adding someone to that mix.

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Delay Gratification: According to the Journal of Sex Research, bringing yourself close to climax but stopping, slowing down, and getting yourself back up to the brink of ecstasy, but not quite getting there, repeated a few times, can help enhance your “O” significantly. I’m probably way too impatient for this, because I’ve never tried this before, but it seems like it might work. If you’ve tried this before, comment below or email me and let me know how it went.

Focus on your C-spot: Not surprisingly, you should worship your clitoris (or have someone worship it for you) if you want to get any type of orgasm, ever. Clitoris, clitoris clitoris! Make sure you’re getting in the positions that allow for maximum clitoral contact. In other words, when he’s got your legs all the way up in the air (and getting his) make sure something’s still showing your clitoris some love (even if it’s you).

Get the Right Gear: Although I’m personally not a huge fan of toys (I’m big on intimacy and human contact) I do believe there are toys that can assist in getting to that O faster and more effectively. It’s simple, toys allow you to do several things at once, and keeping constant attention on the clitoris while doing other things is not an easy job all the time. Toys can help with the multi-tasking of it all.

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These next few were added by me, replacing the last few ways Women’s Health suggested.

Speak Up: I think it’s really important to speak up and let your partner know what’s working and what isn’t. I know it can get really awkward really fast when it comes to communicating during sex, but there are many subtle ways to let guide your partner and let him know what really gets your motors running. I struggle with this because I just rather be talked to than do the talking, but I’ve found even passively mentioning what you like in conversation and giving hints can help. Nothing is better than being able to grab your partner's hand and tell them exactly what you want, how you want it and where. Many men admit this actually turns them on rather than offends them. It can also help your partner reach a better orgasm, since he’s relaxed and more confident he’s giving you what you want.

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Be selective. Be selective with your partners. Not saying that being sexually free can’t get you the orgasms you want, but having sex with someone you’re truly compatible with is going to give you a better orgasm. A woman’s mental state plays a huge part in whether she climaxes or not, so when you’re comfortable and completely at ease with your partner, there’s a way better chance you’ll get that orgasm you need.

Get WET. This may sound a little redundant as I mentioned earlier being appropriately lubricated plays an important role in the big O. However, if you’re not at all naturally lubricated down there, chances are you’re simply not turned on enough yet. A lot of the times women gauge when to have sex by when the man’s turned on, but if you hold out long enough for your pussy to catch some moisture, chances are your vagina’s motors are running and she’ll be ready to give you that O.

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Lastly, I won't include this as one of the "10 ways" because I think it should go without saying: NEVER FUCKING FAKE AN ORGASM. It's fucking pointless and you're not helping anyone by faking it, least of all yourself.