Reverse Cowgirl

Reverse Cowgirl
Source: Cosmopolitan Magazine

Source: Cosmopolitan Magazine

Inspiration struck me on my last trip to Barnes and Nobles. I’ve always wanted to work for a women’s magazine, but I never found one I was really into, so a spontaneous jolt of inspiration led me to Barnes, in search of a women’s magazine I would actually enjoy. As I perused the section, I realized that ironically, every single “women’s” magazine seemed obsessed with men.

Unless they were exclusively dedicated to celebrity gossip or fashion, most of the magazines had some variation of: How to figure out what men want, what men want in the bedroom, what men want in the kitchen, what men want for christmas, or tips on “how to read his mind”. The media seems convinced that women are obsessed with figuring out what men want from them.

And they’re right.  

Women are way too obsessed with what men think. And we keep missing the obvious. Why aren’t they just as obsessed? Why aren’t all men magazines declaring the best ways to get women in the sack, why aren’t they publishing how to read our minds, or what foods turn us on? Instead, men’s magazines advise men on business, investing, health...you know, things that matter to THEM. Why? Because men are taught to believe they are enough. They are taught that as long as they work on themselves, the women will come. They don’t sit there and stress about whether women get turned on more by black or brown shoes.

So, here’s the obvious shit that none of these magazines want women to know about what men want. Men want us to stop worrying about what they want, and just be our fabulous selves. That’s the sexiest thing you could do. Be so confident in you, you never stop and wonder what someone might want of you.  

Source: Aminablue.com

Source: Aminablue.com

You know what’s sexy in the bedroom? When you chase your own damn orgasm. Believe it or not, that takes confidence. Riding it for you, is riding it right. It just happens, effortlessly, when you cut out all the over thinking about what they want. Every time I’ve wondered what a man wanted from me, I ended up fucking it up. Why? No one knows exactly what they want, they just know when they find it. Wondering what someone wants and thinking you can just morph into that, is not only stupid, it’s unattractive. Ever been called crazy? That’s where it is. Believing that. That’s the crazy.

Source: Instagram

Source: Instagram

For example, let’s say, you like to go out and you happen to meet a guy one day who says he prefers girls who stay home… so you begin to stay home more. And then he obviously cheats on you with a party girl bartender who’s always out on the scene. I know too many stories like this. It’s like dancing. Have you ever tried dancing while worrying if you’re doing it right every two steps? You probably danced like shit. But when you let the music take you, let your body do what it wants to do, you steal the show.

Too many relationships are built on shaky foundations because no one seems to realize that when we obsess about what someone might want from us, we are simply projecting our own insecurities. It’s all imaginary. It’s how companies sell us products we don’t need,  and how we pay for our own brainwash. Society has conditioned women to be very susceptible to this, and the cycle never ends. We stress about what men want, take the wrong advice from the media, get it wrong, then wonder what’s wrong with us. Then, we go and buy some products to make up for “what’s wrong with us”. The media creates this void then watches us go broke trying to use their same bad advice to fill it.

Voidfiller.vulgarmagazine

The truth is, you’re never going to keep someone enthralled in you if you are not being you. You’re never going to ride that dick right if you’re busy worrying how he wants you to ride it. Focus on catching your orgasm...fuck his orgasm. Literally and metaphorically: Fuck him. Make it about you, and you’ll give him the ride of his life. In the words of Missy Elliott, put it down, flip it, and reverse it.

Ever been in a relationship like this: At first, they are enthralled with figuring out who you are, then as soon as you get busy trying to figure them out, boom. Queue their loss of interest. The thing is, men are simple. If you really want to know what men want, stop worrying about it, cowgirl.

Source: Instagram

Source: Instagram